I am having an exceptionally hard time concentrating right now. Perhaps because it's Thursday and the weekend is so near (for me--today is my Friday), I just can't seem to be productive. Maybe it's the result of a week of trying to play catch up, of recovering from being ill, or perhaps I'm just too jacked up on caffeine, or I just don't want to face what's left for me to do, but I just can't do it. And when I feel this way, there's no point in "trying to push through"--it takes me three times as long to complete a task as it should, and I regret the time spent struggling through the task rather than just not doing it. Sure I might regret it tomorrow or this weekend, but I'm really just kind of done with this week.

I feel like my schedule is exhausting, but here's the thing--every other schedule I could design for myself would be equally exhausting, and I'm always so thankful on Thursday nights that I have Friday off. Getting to Thursday can be a struggle, but at 3:50, I'm done until Monday. I like having a three day weekend every weekend.

I do wish that I had brought the work for my book that I need to have with me. Or I guess I could keep working on transferring stuff from my computer to a flash drive so that I can clean the computer out so that I can have a better functioning computer. It runs really slow because I have like less than 1 GB of space on it. But I hoard. I feel like everything, especially pictures should be at my fingertips, and I refuse to spend the money on a computer with a larger hard drive (especially when I have a terabyte external drive), because why? It's not going to make me any smarter. It will just be a shiny new thing with which to play and avoid work. It's not going to get the proposal written any sooner.

I'm teaching my first on-line course next fall. I don't want to teach on-line. I've been resistant to it for a long, long time. However, an on-line grad class in a subject I care about is preferable to me than a comp class. And it's probably only something that I'll have to do once every two years (or less), and shouldn't preclude other grad classes. Although, we don't get a course release for teaching a grad class, so I'm less excited about the prospect of teaching grad classes than I was. But if I can be online in my pjs in my bedroom rather than here, then that might be worth it.

I feel like the biggest slacker prof. Maybe I am, now that I am all make up free and here in a Darth Vader t-shirt and jeans. The students actually really dig it though. I think I'm becoming queen of the geeks and nerds here, which is fine. It attracts a certain type of student who wants to build rapport with me and means that class discussions get better. I don't mind being the prof that the nerds and geeks gravitate toward.

I guess I should attempt to get myself together a bit before class. Today is just one of those days where I'd rather just be at home in my pjs reading and working from there. I'm not necessarily opposed to work right now, I just would rather be bundled up on my chair feigning intellectualism aspiring toward productivity. Oh well. Such is life. So I will read a bit and do some make shift prep here and then be done with it and make my way through class which will get me that much closer to the weekend.