So.Far.Behind.

Y'all, I feel like I'm spiraling out of control here! I am missing deadlines on the grad class. I'm behind on the grad class now. I had planned on reading the text I needed to this past weekend (I have to give a working title for the chapter, but I've never actually read the text or seen the movie, but I didn't expect I'd have to give a title this early! It's not due until end of Feb), and it was just a book on criticism and my copy of the text was in my office so I ordered it for the kindle, and damn, I cannot read serious stuff on the kindle. I can read light reading on there, but when it comes to something "deep," nope. I could not follow. So now I'm behind on that because I have no idea what the story is about.

I'm behind on the book for the grad class. I haven't read that one in about 18 years. Yikes.

I'm behind on the grad class grading.

I'm behind on the article.

I'm behind on the book proposal.

In short, I'm behind on life.

I'm now stressed about money and tenure.

And I'm having trouble sleeping, which of course makes the stress worse.

I'm am having trouble keeping my $hit together and being successful at anything here.

I did get the food for the week prepped, so at least I don't have to worry about that. Cooking should be easy. I've got a load of clothes in the washer that need to go in the dryer, and once I put the clothes away, the laundry room is empty, so that means the laundry is finished.

I'm plagued by headaches because of the stress. Having the internet go out on campus that one morning really set me very far behind schedule. It sucks. I'm overwhelmed, and I hate that feeling. And I know the way not to feel this way is to get things done, but there are so many things to get done. And everything is both urgent and important. Yesterday I had to take a nap. Both the hubs and I were so snippy at each other, and I pretty much abandoned the kid to him yesterday. She didn't seem to miss me--she got lots of daddy time which she doesn't get during the week, but still. Argh.

I feel like I'm simply in survival mode right now. I hate that feeling. I don't want to be in survival mode. I want to be in thrival mode (I'm going to just make up words here).

All right, well anyway, I'm going to make a to do list of what I need to get to work on for the next few days, set up some goals, and then try to get a little bit done before I leave campus and go home.