Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Hello from the depths! Anyone still out there??

Oh my fair bloggy friends I have missed you dearly!! This quarter has just been so hellacious that I've not really been able to keep up with all of you, nor have I been able to keep up with my poor little blog here. Part of it is that I just spend so much time on the computer grading that being on the computer for recreation is not an option. Actually, it's quite unpleasant. And while my little MacBook Air is great for travel and carting to and fro campus, sitting at the kitchen table typing on it after staring at it all day to grade is just not my idea of destressing and relaxing anymore. But I'm finally back on the home desktop here! What would become the nursery has been a storage room, and I hate that the Magpie has to share his/her room with me so I can have an office space, but that's how it will be. There's no room in what is now the official guest room, and even if there were, my parents are basically moving in in September to help with the kid, so I wouldn't be able to work at will in there anyway. Plus, it's just a short distance from the desk to the crib, so perhaps it will work out just fine for when I need to work, and the kid needs me or something. Who knows?

This is the final week of classes. I have been a madwoman up until about last Thursday. And these four classes have had me so stressed that I was starting to worry about its affect on the fetus so much that I asked the specialist about it. He said there's nothing to indicate that my stress level has affected the baby, thank god. We went to California for a conference about mid-quarter, so that helped. It was wonderfully relaxing. I was able to get all of my reading for the overload class done for the remainder of the quarter on the plane, so that helped tremendously. It also meant that I could spend my time grading. And that is basically all that I've done since April--grade. With the overload class, there's just no break, as those of you who teach four classes know. There's a tremendous difference between 3 and 4 classes. And honestly, if I weren't pregnant, I wouldn't complain as much. I'd be pissed, still, for sure, but my exhaustion level wouldn't be so enormous. But oh well. This is the last week of classes. We're watching movies in three of the four (I should be done with the TR class today!) and presentations in the fourth. I was really irate with the grading last week because I very much got the impression that (and this was confirmed some by student postings on FB) since other people's classes are "harder" and those profs are "notorious" and people want "As" in their classes, students put more effort into their papers for the other profs than for my class, and the assumption is that because I'm very pregnant and very tired, I'd give them a pass. Which is funny because two students at least in the upper division class this quarter told me they were worried because they had heard that I'm a "notoriously hard grader." So I took the crap that was turned in personally.

What do I mean by crap? Grad students, who I know know better, using an on-line dictionary as a main secondary source. Grad students who, even after I shut down this argument on the paper proposal, still insisted on turning in a paper about "Poe's unique and excellent style." WTF? Really? I wouldn't take that from a fucking survey course paper. English majors in a senior level class who decided that they didn't need to do any citations throughout the entire essay. Book reviews and biographies of poets rather than actual research papers. And I know the problem is not the assignment because about half of these offenders have seen this before, and it's a pretty clear cut RESEARCH PAPER assignment that as upper division students they should be able to handle. And should, at this point, be able to write 8 pages at a minimum in their sleep. On more than one I wrote, "this is lazy." And on the grad student papers I had to write, "This is not what I expect out of a grad student at this point. This is undergrad work." They can pass it off as bitchy pregnant lady, but don't fucking waste my time at this point. Look, I do understand that it's essay triage here at the end of the quarter, but at least acknowledge it's lazy crap. That I'll at least respect. It'll be graded accordingly--crap is crap--but own it at least.

Anyway, enough of that rant. Here are some of the good things--My parents were in for about two weeks. The only reason I'm sane right now is because of them. My mom helped with the cooking--she did all of it last week. She cleaned my whole house. She even spent about 6 hours just cleaning and dusting and organizing my bedroom! And she cleaned my bathroom. The woman is a machine. And she did all of our laundry. My dad helped clean, break down boxes, go to the dump with Jeremy to get rid of stuff, started working on stripping a toy box so we can refinish it for the nursery, painted the nursery--while Mom worked on my bedroom, I cleaned, organized, and trashed a bunch of stuff that was in "storage" and got it ready to be painted so it could be a nursery. We organized the kitchen. And since Mom took care of the chores, I was able to spend last week grading everything as it came in daily. Which means that by Saturday morning, I had everything graded and calculated up to that point and could start yesterday with a clean slate. Yesterday I graded all of the take home exams I had taken up and the lit analyses for the poetry class. I got two of the three sets of senior grades calculated and submitted already. I will finish grading the seniors' stuff for the lit class this morning and get those done before noon. I busted my ass last week (and was only able to because Mom did all the others things for me like cooked) so I could grade. My goal is to be done with this damn quarter by 3 pm on Friday. If I get all the stuff for today done, that means I get to take this afternoon off. That means tomorrow I can focus on the stuff that's coming in and get that stuff done. That leaves Thursday free and clear, and it means that on Friday, all I have to do is worry about the in class exams for the survey classes, and those will be relatively easy to grade. I am just so damn ready to be done with this quarter, to put it behind me and never ever think about it again. I don't care if the evals are bad. I expect them to be. I'm only human. Overloaded with two courses not in my field and only related to what I do because they're American lit. And if it weren't for my parents, I'd be nowhere near close to being finished right now or on top of the grading.

And let me just say, last weekend when we got the nursery cleaned out and ready to be painted, my stress level just plummeted. Knowing that all of that is done, the nursery and the guest bedroom, is a total load off my mind because it's not waiting for me to do when the quarter is over. I can really actually make some progress on an article before the kid gets here. I can start stockpiling some food in the freezer for dinner for after the kid gets here. I can get the kid's clothes and blankets and stuff washed and done. I can cook. I can keep working out and get sleep as well. Since the organizing and cleaning and painting are done, and that is a load off my mind, I might actually be able to relax a bit before the kid gets here.

I also switched my work out schedule. But that's another post. Perhaps Thursday. :)

So there it is. The end of the quarter angst and bitchiness, but damn, I'm almost done. I'm still hopeful about being able to get some work done before the kid gets here, especially since everything else is just about in order, so we'll see how that goes. For those of you still finishing your quarter, here's to a good one for you. For those of you done with your semesters, I'm jealous!

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